Never Mind The Weather, Go Somewhere and Get Our Minds Together!
“Jess” (Jennifer), I am so sorry that Mr. Combs didn’t see the true value that you had to offer: your great wardrobe selections, infinite wisdom and bomb ass dance skills. All of your pearls of wisdom and catchy sayings like “I beg to differ” and “Martha being Martin Luther King’s wife” didn’t get you any closer to the finish line. Sorry…if only Diddy could have seen what he was really missing when he dismissed you!
Moving on… when Cap brought us this week’s instructions, Jen was actually still with us. We were divided into two teams, and Jen was put with me and “Potter” (Dan). Jen had never worked with me and Dan before, so she didn’t truly understand our dynamic. Our dynamic is that I give out the instructions and Dan figures out the best way to get it done. At this point, Dan and I had been out to the store with each other more than enough times. I taught him how to get in, get what we need and get out. I also showed him that preparing the list beforehand is essential. It was obvious that Jen has not done a lot of grocery shopping in her lifetime, because she was clueless. She was all over the place trying to get different things and didnt’ know what we really needed. It must be so hard to go to the grocery store to get items to cook when you can’t cook! Your girl (me) can throw down in the kitchen. What you all haven’t gotten to see is that throughout the entire competition, I cooked breakfast, lunch and dinner for everyone in the house. If you don’t believe me, look at Kennis…anyone can see that he never missed a meal!
That evening when we got home, the meal had already been prepared by the Chef’s institute. They decided we should see how the meal was being prepared and what it should taste like. We also received a crash course on how to serve food correctly and arranging the place settings. It was a hectic evening and we barely had time to taste the meal let alone learn every lesson that was being taught to us that night. Ms. Ebony was a little bit overwhelmed…she had never experienced a four-course, sit down meal and had no clue about some of the items we were serving and eating. But, she did step up to the plate and offer to cook since she had previously worked in the kitchen of a Waffle House and knew how to run a serving line.
On the day of the event, we had to first prepare the meal at home and finish it on the yacht. For those of you who have been on a luxury boat, you know that the kitchen is very small yet efficient. So while Ebony and I were prepping the meal, Dan and Dalen were out running errands. Throughout the day, the guest list grew from 5 to 15 people, the menu switched from spinach to green beans and more people need to picked up. Yes, I have dealt with transportation for a very long time and fully understand the logistics on getting people to and from various locations. I also understand that it can be totally overwhelming. And in the beginning, before we actually had to prep the meal, I was in charge of transportation. But someone had to help Ebony cook so Dan needed to step up and handle it. All he had to do was make calls to the limo company and make sure everyone was picked up while running errands…simple. I gave him specific instructions on what to do…simple things that are tricks of the trade that you learn as you go along. But Dan just was so adamant about being able to handle it that he didn’t handle it. He lost the children, didn’t pick up a few people, and the cars were not ready when it was time to go!
Dalen had to run and get all of the extra stuff that was needed, because no one else able to do it. Ebony was getting the meal ready and I was waiting on the guests and helping Dan set everything up. Dalen should have been mad as hell at Dan for not bringing wine in the first place. When they were out earlier (while Ebony and I were prepping the food), more bottles of wine should have been picked up. Dan bragged about being an expert in the wine field…that is all he ever talked about. He often told me that he would make me a wine lover if it killed him. I picture him right now on somebody’s vineyard working with somebody’s grapes. So for him not to get any wine and for us to run out of wine was totally on him.
Things just kept going from bad to worse on the boat! The guests arrived late because of the transportation issues, forcing the risotto to sit for an hour. Dan brought back moldy ass string beans, we were forced to serve sorbet in shot glasses which was Dan’s brilliant idea and all of the children wanted French toast at the last minute. It was always something. But, we pulled it off and that was all that mattered. The pound cake I baked was off the chain and my fresh whipped cream could have made you slap your momma! We weren’t surprised that Dan won…he had the most face time and did take a lot of heat which mostly came from his own doing! And when he picked Dalen, Ebony and I were fine with his decision because we already knew he would. But let’s be real…you can’t have a meal without food and the double Ds didn’t cook sh*t!
Dan just doesn’t have a clue about what is really going on….he really is the nicest kid but is not ready for what Mr. Combs needs right now. Dalen tried to create a pact with Dan, because this is a competition and that is what you do. But when Dan chose me, I thought it was a low blow. I had been protecting Dan the entire time and did nothing but bail him out while Dalen threw him straight under the bus. Luckily, the judges recognized I should not have been up there and sat both me and Dan down.
The reality of this show is who can survive and get to the finish line first. All anybody wants to know is who won not how you won. So I am getting it done to the best of my ability… and in the end So What If You Don’t Like It!